It's Autumn again. My favourite season.
The days begin with glorious blue skies and sunshine streaming through my bedroom window. I wake up feeling instantly happy and inspired. Possibly because there is a man in my bed to my left who I feel happy with. We spend the morning in each other's company, enveloped in a dewy satisfied glow, until he has to leave to go to an exhibition, or meet a friend for brunch.
I pour myself a cup of Earl Grey and read a magazine before pulling on black jeans, grey converse, and dashing out to meet a friend for Bloody Marys and Eggs Benedict.
We gossip in a little cafe in Hampstead while the rain has started to fall heavily against the window we're sat next to.
I am always amazed at how different London looks in the rain. Melancholy and miserable. It makes me want to curl up in bed, listening to the sound of it falling, no matter how awake I am. But today I don't mind.
We gossip about the men in our lives and the ways in which they annoy us. We can't decide whether taking too long to respond to a text takes first place over not talking about how you feel...The latter is probably more important, and it makes me wonder how long you can date someone before you feel like you need more from them.
In the beginning, it's exciting to receive a text message out of the blue, or to see them one evening a week, but as time goes on, you find yourself getting more than just a text once in a while. Seeing them a few times a week becomes the norm, as does hanging out with their friends and meeting their family. You begin to predict their behaviour, and when things don't add up to your predictions, you begin to worry.
I have always been a true worrier. Pessimistic at heart, and constantly waiting for something to go wrong. Perhaps it's because I have been so let down in the past, but then again, the memories of good moments always become quickly overshadowed by anything questionable.
A friend of mine once told me that all emotions are good. It's what makes us feel alive. Even in the midst of a breakdown....Feel your emotions. They're raw and real and maybe it's what'll make you better understand them.
After all, whatever will be will be. Until then, be happy. Live in the moment, and don't wait for it to fall apart.
The days begin with glorious blue skies and sunshine streaming through my bedroom window. I wake up feeling instantly happy and inspired. Possibly because there is a man in my bed to my left who I feel happy with. We spend the morning in each other's company, enveloped in a dewy satisfied glow, until he has to leave to go to an exhibition, or meet a friend for brunch.
I pour myself a cup of Earl Grey and read a magazine before pulling on black jeans, grey converse, and dashing out to meet a friend for Bloody Marys and Eggs Benedict.
We gossip in a little cafe in Hampstead while the rain has started to fall heavily against the window we're sat next to.
I am always amazed at how different London looks in the rain. Melancholy and miserable. It makes me want to curl up in bed, listening to the sound of it falling, no matter how awake I am. But today I don't mind.
We gossip about the men in our lives and the ways in which they annoy us. We can't decide whether taking too long to respond to a text takes first place over not talking about how you feel...The latter is probably more important, and it makes me wonder how long you can date someone before you feel like you need more from them.
In the beginning, it's exciting to receive a text message out of the blue, or to see them one evening a week, but as time goes on, you find yourself getting more than just a text once in a while. Seeing them a few times a week becomes the norm, as does hanging out with their friends and meeting their family. You begin to predict their behaviour, and when things don't add up to your predictions, you begin to worry.
I have always been a true worrier. Pessimistic at heart, and constantly waiting for something to go wrong. Perhaps it's because I have been so let down in the past, but then again, the memories of good moments always become quickly overshadowed by anything questionable.
A friend of mine once told me that all emotions are good. It's what makes us feel alive. Even in the midst of a breakdown....Feel your emotions. They're raw and real and maybe it's what'll make you better understand them.
After all, whatever will be will be. Until then, be happy. Live in the moment, and don't wait for it to fall apart.
I love this post and how well I relate to your feelings...
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