The last month has been a whirlwind to say the least.
After a month of intense dating with Mr ILY everything is over before it began, but we'll get to that shortly....
The week following the bbq saw him come over on the Tuesday. I bought a takeaway for us both as he never suggested anything for dinner and I was hungry. It was delicious, but I was disappointed when he didn't say Thank You. Basic manners should be automatically programmed in everyone, but for him it seems they were not.
Later that night, I suggested watching a movie. This in my head translated to 'watching a movie', but it seems he did not get the hint. We reached the end of Factory Girl, and it was only when I switched the lights off 10mins later that he made a move on me.
After incessantly texting/calling each other the rest of that week, he said that he wanted to take me out and surprise me. He told me to meet him in Covent Garden at 7.30pm, and all of a sudden I was overcome with excitement. I hadn't been treated for a long time and my mind began to race with what he could possibly have in store for me.
Upon meeting, it became clear that there was no surprise. He had nothing booked, but did have two Japanese restaurants in mind. Neither of which he'd been to, and as he awkwardly tried to locate them via Googlemaps on his phone, I decided to take the lead and guide us to one of the restaurants he had in mind. Upon arriving, It became apparent that all they served were noodle dishes, and since I didn't feel like that type of food, I suggested the great Thai place next door.
Dinner was great, and the evening was going really well although I was disappointed that there was no surprise. He asked for the bill, and as the waiter placed it down in front of him, I asked whether he wanted to split it. I was being polite! But with no hesitation he said yes. I guess that was the surprise!
When I found out the next morning that he'd been paid the day before and owned 4 apartments (where he charged the tenants double his mortgages), I was pretty annoyed, but decided to give him another chance.
The following week was hectic for me with moving home and a work trip away, so I invited him over to my new flat that coming Sunday. He arrived at 2pm and we spent the day lounging around chatting whilst the faint noise of Murray's tennis ball hitting Centre Court could be heard in the background.
It was nice and I planned to unwind and have an early night when he left.
As the clock approached 10.30pm, I started to wonder whether I'd have to eventually ask him to leave, so when asked me if he could stay the night, I felt bad but told him I wanted my own company. He'd been there for 8 and a half hours already. For me that was enough. He left an hour later.
The following day he text me telling me how happy he was and that he wanted to take me out somewhere amazing...Little old me was still hopeful, but when a few days later I enquired about our Saturday night date and he said that he had nothing planned, I silently rolled my eyes on the other side of the phone whilst wondering if I should make an excuse and not go.
Instead I decided to set him a challenge to organise the entire night, and crossed my fingers. On Saturday I was given a address in Notting Hill and told to meet at 7pm. A little early for dinner, and so I arrived 20mins late.
The restaurant was brilliant. Greek fusion with flavours I had never experience and quirky cocktails to die for. As the bill was once again placed in front of him, I subtly said that I was popping to the loo.
My plan worked, and we headed off for drinks before dessert at my place. The following morning he took me out for pancakes and although I felt happy, I couldn't shake my doubts about him. Needless to say, he continued being lovely, showering me with compliments and so I tried to persuade my heart to love him. It didn't work.
We decided to go to the cinema the following Thursday, but at the last minute I asked if we could go to dinner instead. I was having an early start on the Friday and suggested meeting in Soho so he could easily get the central line home.
We arrived at the restaurant and although I was a bit tired, I felt fairly happy.
An hour and a half into our lovely dinner, he asked me if I am where I thought I'd be a few years ago. I replied saying that a few years ago I was in a 6year relationship with a man I thought I'd marry, so it was a tricky question. He then stated that he "couldn't imagine me settling down ever", and the rest of the conversation went like this....
As we made our way outside, it was clear that everything had been destroyed in a split second. He seemed uncomfortable and awkward as we tried to say our long winded goodbye. He said he couldn't figure me out. For years he hasn't been able to figure me out.
I asked him if I should cancel the reservation I'd made for our double date on Saturday. He didn't say anything so I said I would. He said yes.
The last thing he said was "Ok." as we instinctively turned our backs to each other and began walking in opposite directions. In my daze I walked from Soho to Chelsea, and luckily avoided getting hit by 4 cars.
I knew I would never see him or hear from him again.
After a month of intense dating with Mr ILY everything is over before it began, but we'll get to that shortly....
The week following the bbq saw him come over on the Tuesday. I bought a takeaway for us both as he never suggested anything for dinner and I was hungry. It was delicious, but I was disappointed when he didn't say Thank You. Basic manners should be automatically programmed in everyone, but for him it seems they were not.
Later that night, I suggested watching a movie. This in my head translated to 'watching a movie', but it seems he did not get the hint. We reached the end of Factory Girl, and it was only when I switched the lights off 10mins later that he made a move on me.
After incessantly texting/calling each other the rest of that week, he said that he wanted to take me out and surprise me. He told me to meet him in Covent Garden at 7.30pm, and all of a sudden I was overcome with excitement. I hadn't been treated for a long time and my mind began to race with what he could possibly have in store for me.
Upon meeting, it became clear that there was no surprise. He had nothing booked, but did have two Japanese restaurants in mind. Neither of which he'd been to, and as he awkwardly tried to locate them via Googlemaps on his phone, I decided to take the lead and guide us to one of the restaurants he had in mind. Upon arriving, It became apparent that all they served were noodle dishes, and since I didn't feel like that type of food, I suggested the great Thai place next door.
Dinner was great, and the evening was going really well although I was disappointed that there was no surprise. He asked for the bill, and as the waiter placed it down in front of him, I asked whether he wanted to split it. I was being polite! But with no hesitation he said yes. I guess that was the surprise!
When I found out the next morning that he'd been paid the day before and owned 4 apartments (where he charged the tenants double his mortgages), I was pretty annoyed, but decided to give him another chance.
The following week was hectic for me with moving home and a work trip away, so I invited him over to my new flat that coming Sunday. He arrived at 2pm and we spent the day lounging around chatting whilst the faint noise of Murray's tennis ball hitting Centre Court could be heard in the background.
It was nice and I planned to unwind and have an early night when he left.
As the clock approached 10.30pm, I started to wonder whether I'd have to eventually ask him to leave, so when asked me if he could stay the night, I felt bad but told him I wanted my own company. He'd been there for 8 and a half hours already. For me that was enough. He left an hour later.
The following day he text me telling me how happy he was and that he wanted to take me out somewhere amazing...Little old me was still hopeful, but when a few days later I enquired about our Saturday night date and he said that he had nothing planned, I silently rolled my eyes on the other side of the phone whilst wondering if I should make an excuse and not go.
Instead I decided to set him a challenge to organise the entire night, and crossed my fingers. On Saturday I was given a address in Notting Hill and told to meet at 7pm. A little early for dinner, and so I arrived 20mins late.
The restaurant was brilliant. Greek fusion with flavours I had never experience and quirky cocktails to die for. As the bill was once again placed in front of him, I subtly said that I was popping to the loo.
My plan worked, and we headed off for drinks before dessert at my place. The following morning he took me out for pancakes and although I felt happy, I couldn't shake my doubts about him. Needless to say, he continued being lovely, showering me with compliments and so I tried to persuade my heart to love him. It didn't work.
We decided to go to the cinema the following Thursday, but at the last minute I asked if we could go to dinner instead. I was having an early start on the Friday and suggested meeting in Soho so he could easily get the central line home.
We arrived at the restaurant and although I was a bit tired, I felt fairly happy.
An hour and a half into our lovely dinner, he asked me if I am where I thought I'd be a few years ago. I replied saying that a few years ago I was in a 6year relationship with a man I thought I'd marry, so it was a tricky question. He then stated that he "couldn't imagine me settling down ever", and the rest of the conversation went like this....
Me: "Actually, I'm happiest when settled. I just haven't found anyone I'd like to settle with."
Him: "No, I just said that because you seem to go out a lot. You date a lot, and I can't imagine you with anyone".
Me: "I go out a lot because I was in a long relationship and had never dated. Dating still freaks me out and I am always really careful who I choose to have a serious relationship with because I go into it hoping that it wont end".
Him: "So what do you think in terms of me? Us?"
Me: "It still freaks me out, and I feel in control the whole time which I hate. I feel like I lead everything we do."
Him: " I disagree. I think I'm just more flexible whereas you're quite set in your ways. Y'know, I mean, I don't feel like I can call you up and ask if you wanted to chill in a park or something".
Me: "Why not?"
Him: "Because you only seem to like going to expensive places. You're very set in your ways"
Me: "That's bullshit. One of my favourite things to do is to sit in a park on a sunny day, or lie in bed all Sunday. I treat myself yes, but I don't care what I do when I'm with someone because I usually enjoy their company, and being with them is all I care about, not how expensive the restaurant we're in is. You obviously don't know me very well at all".
Him: "Yeah. I guess I don't".
As we made our way outside, it was clear that everything had been destroyed in a split second. He seemed uncomfortable and awkward as we tried to say our long winded goodbye. He said he couldn't figure me out. For years he hasn't been able to figure me out.
I asked him if I should cancel the reservation I'd made for our double date on Saturday. He didn't say anything so I said I would. He said yes.
The last thing he said was "Ok." as we instinctively turned our backs to each other and began walking in opposite directions. In my daze I walked from Soho to Chelsea, and luckily avoided getting hit by 4 cars.
I knew I would never see him or hear from him again.
